ALL SHE WANTS IS A BOYFRIEND

She watches television. She reads novels. She listens to music and has conversations with her friends. All she wants is a boyfriend! She does not want to sleep with him but she loves the feeling of romance like in the novels that she reads. All she wants is a boyfriend. She's only 13. She's exposed to much more than we ever were. Here are a few things to tell a 13 year old girl who wants a boyfriend.

There Is No Rush

I remember when I was 13, I wanted to be 16 and when I was 16 I wanted to be 21 but the truth of the matter is there is no rush to grow up and there is no need to indulge in what is meant for adults. I say have boys as friends. Have lots of them but getting yourself romantically involved with a boy at 13 is too young and distracting. 

Tracey rebelled against her mother soon after her dad died. She was grieving about the loss of her father but instead of seeking help from the family, she got involved with a boy who was much older than her. What were the consequences? Pregnancy at 13.

Having A Crush Is Normal

I always say to young girls that having the occasional crush on a boy is normal. It shows that you are no longer a little girl anymore and that you are moving from little girl into a woman. But you are not quite there yet. Even though your body may have developed into a woman’s shape, you are definitely not equipped for all the emotions of being in an adult relationship.

Implications

Aside from getting pregnant, a young girl who decides to have a boyfriend may end up catching STD (without protection) if she decides to sleep with him. Some girls say that they are just dating and not sleeping with their boyfriends at 13 but it just takes one kiss and then you may to let your guards down and be caught out. Teenage pregnancy is on the increase all over the world and I would encourage girls to abstain. There is a season for everything.

Find A Hobby

At 13, there is so much more to life than having a boyfriend. You have your life ahead of you to engage in all that. At this stage of your life, focus at being the best you. This is time to study and get good grades. Look after your body. Look after your mind and look after your self-respect.

For Parents & Guardian

Sometimes girls seek love outside the home because they don’t feel loved. Always keep the communication open with girls and find out of there are any issues. Tell them how much you love and care for them. Don’t be a stranger.

CONFIDENT PLEDGE

JEALOUSLY! JEALOUSLY!

It is my dream that every girl values herself and appreciates who she is, so that she will never be jealous of anyone. It is natural to feel a little envious every now and then but when it turns into jealously it can actually be quite ugly. I always tell girls that they are valuable and that they should not be jealous of anyone because they are unique and special in their own right.

Unfortunately there are some girls who have a strong tendency to be jealous of other girls and can actually make their victims life quite miserable. Most of the time, it is not that these jealous girls have less but they just don’t seem to be happy when others are happy. Hopefully the tips below will help cure any signs of jealously.

Be Happy With What You Have

One of the ways of curbing jealously is to be happy for what you have. You might look at someone’s life and wish you had it, but you should truly be happy for what you have. Anytime you feel jealous, count your blessings. You may not have all the material things that Ngozi’s has, but if you have never been sick or never been to hospital then should really count your blessings. I am sure there is something to be thankful for.

Compliment Others

Nothing cures jealously more than complimenting another person. If you feel that green eyed monster rising up just compliment the person that you are feeling jealous of. And you will see that spirit fade away. Faith was lean and had a great figure. But as for Kene, no matter how much food she cut down on, she couldn’t be like Faith and she was very jealous. She was horrible to Faith and called her names. One day she just decided to stop it and complimented instead. She felt much better with herself.

Be Happy For Others

Another way you can cure yourself of this demon called jealously is by being genuinely happy for others. I always say, ‘ Happy are those who are happy for others’. And that is so true because when you are happy for others you won’t be jealous. Your own victory is round the corner when you are happy for others.

The Grass Isn’t Always Greener

Sometimes girls get jealous of others because they think the other person is living such a great life and you are not. But we don’t know how the other person lives. We just see a snap shot. You might see Yinka turn up to school in a different Mercedes and it looks like her life is just the best but you don’t know what goes on behind closes doors in her house. Don’t be jealous. Just be grateful and thankful for your own life.

Cure it Fast

If jealously is not dealt with it can be a lifelong battle, so nip it the bud before it ruins you. Unfortunately for some girls, jealously has really taken over them. They grow into bitter women. Let me share a little secret. Every human being is going through their own battle. Nobody has it all together. We all have our own personal struggles. Don’t be jealous of any. Run your on race of life and be your best.

I wish you the very best. 

HOW TO OVERCOME STAGE FRIGHT

Ashley has a great voice. She sings in front of her family. She sings in the bathroom. She sings on her way to school but she is petrified of singing to a large crowd. Her music teacher always encourages her to sing and has put her name forward for a lead role in the music concert. But Ashley has accepted to take part but is scared. The following tips will help Ashley or any other girl that feels nervous about singing in front of a crowd. Remember you are valuable and if you have a gift, like singing and if you want to share it to the world, then you shouldn’t be afraid to.

Take Baby Steps

If you are scared to sing in front of a large crowd just take baby steps. Start by singing in front of your family. Then try singing in front of your friends. Gradually upgrade and sing in the church or school choir before taken the plunge to sing in front of a large crowd. Tia said when she started singing she fumbled a few times and then got better and now she is a professional singer.

Believe In Your Gift

If everyone says that you have a great voice, chances are you probably do. But you have to believe in your voice and your gift. Why not record your voice and see how talented you are? Demi is a seasoned singer. She performs all over the world. She didn’t start off like that. She was quite shy. But she started writing a journal. She read daily affirmations stating that she was one of the best singers in the world and today she is. She had to believe it before it turned into a reality.

Feel The Fear

Feel the fear of singing and do it anyway. Singing brings healing to many and encourages the soul. Take your mind off yourself and heal someone. Nancy said she was encouraged by her mother to sing. So she sang in church and gradually built up confidence. She grew more confident as people complimented her and told her how her singing impacted them. She stop being afraid to sing.

Visualisation

You can practice visualizing singing to an audience, feeling in control and at ease and really enjoying the moment. Believe the audience are really supporting you and are encouraging you. As you continue to think these positive thoughts of your performance, you will be actually surprised at how well you do.  Chichi says she normally has to take the lead role in her church but nobody notices how nervous she gets when she is on stage but when she visualizes singing to God then all her nerves slip away.

Butterflies Are Normal

Even the most seasoned celebrities get butterflies in their stomach before they go on stage. It is quite natural to do so. Just take a deep break and believe in your gift and believe in your value. You will be surprised at how well you do.